I'm a biker, please understand...I have a whip on my clutch lever, a knife on my side! See More
The 3 car lengths I leave between the car in front of me isn't for you to cut me off! Contrary to popular belief, I can't stop my bike on a dime! If you see me coming down the road while you're waiting to pull out from your driveway or an intersecting road, I'm going faster than you think, so please wait those few extra seconds to let me pass you by...If you're trying to make a right turn on red, don't do it in front of me, you don't have the right of way!
I speed up, when in your blind spot, not to race, but so you see me!
Don't try to pass me on the right just to cut me off, I guarantee my bike is faster than that piece of shit Hybrid you bought to save the ecological system for your grandchildren! You know the Hybrid you drive 90 MPH, thinking y'all are saving the universe.
I ride in the left lane, 10-15 MPH over the speed limit so I only have to worry about asshats like you on my right side.
Please put your phone down, and STOP TEXTING, because the life you jeopardize is MINE and if that's a problem for you, remember my whip and other 2 friends.
My bike is loud so you deaf sonsabitches can hear me coming.
When making a lane change, the manufacturer of that Hybrid you bought installed little devices known as MIRRORS and TURN SIGNALS, so I strongly suggest that you use them every time and also, don't be afraid to give a quick look over your shoulder before you barge into the lane I possess.
I ride with my high beams on at all times so you blind asses can see me day and night, so don't flash your high beams at me.
When I grab my whip that's just a warning and if you take notice you'll never have to meet my knife or my Lil Friend!
I have a roll of pennies unleashed in my vest pocket! If you continue to jeopardize my life, you'll receive what is known as "pennies from heaven" and if they should happen to fall out of said pocket, you'll be making an appointment at your friendly, local body shop, and you'll know the tune to "Safelite" and will be singing it in your sleep...you know the one, "Safelite repair, Safelite replace"...
So watch out for me and all my Brothers and Sisters, every time you are on the road... Better yet, make it a habit and we'll all be better off!
Safelite repair, Safelite replace, betcha are singing that song now huh?